I don’t have the right to write this post because I’m in fact, a pessimist….and by stating that…I’m showing the pessimist side of me. Just kidding. I’m only a pessimist when it comes to relationship (you know…boy girl relationship). In other stuff, I’m quite an optimistic person. However, I have a few friends who are our typical pessimistic individuals who have very low level of confidence.
Beware though…because having low level of confidence does not help at all (especially females…who tend to be less confident than males…for some reasons which I don’t know).
Having a proper level of confidence is very important in every aspect of our life. If you are in the sales line, you need to show your confident personality when you are trying to “brainwash” the customer into buying your product. If you’re in the consulting line, you need to be confident when presenting or negotiating with your clients…….so that they believe in whatever you’re telling them. And even if you’re a clerk or secretary, you need to be confident enough to know that you can handle the workloads with ease. The list goes on and on…but you get the idea
So what happens if you don’t feel confident in whatever you’re doing? You start to complain….and worrying about things which should not have crossed your mind. “How am I supposed to do this?” …“I’m incompetent ! I’m useless !”… rather than “I can do this. I WILL do this”…or “This looks difficult but I should be able to sort it out…maybe I can Google for it”.
Always remember that our brain can create miracles…or wonders that we are not aware of….yet, it can create havoc or chaos if you allowed it. Be optimistic and create wonders….and not the other way round.
Being optimistic is good but don’t get carried away and become over-confident. I’ve walked across that path a few times before…and I didn’t really like the outcomes. That is why, it is equally important to be at the right level of confidence and stay HUMBLE. Don’t go showing off to everyone just because you know something or you are good at something. Be humble and accept other people’s opinions. We’re all learning …. a never ending process in our life.
So…what’s the point here? Be optimistic and humble? That’s easier to say than to be done. True, it’s very easy to blame ourselves and be a pessimist……..and it’s equally easy to get carried away by our small ‘good fortunes‘ or ‘successes‘. Try to strike a balance – have the right amount of confidence…and being humble.
I know it’s not easy…but nothing is easy in our life. Just treat it as a challenge. 🙂
p/s….still recovering from my “lack of sleep” problem. That’s why my points/ideas in the article above …kinda jumbled up.
Alvin Lim - The Thinker 
2 comments
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April 4, 2007 at 12:00 am
Angie Tan
To digress a little about the females having low confidence level. Not all females have low confidence. 😉
Perhaps what may be perceived as low confidence is the fact that females may not always show an aggressive side, i.e. being loud and bossy. When a female shows such behaviour, some may perceive them to be a b****.
Anyway, I would have to admit, most females have low confidence is because some of us are bred that way (esp if you’re of Asian heritage). Hence, they may exude levels of pessimism and low confidence.
I would have to agree that being an optimist is good, because it brings a feel-good feeling all around.
However, being an optimist and a dreamer are two separate things. Yes, you can be optimistic about your chances, but don’t let that get into your head to build sandcastles in the air. That’s being too optimistic.
I had a friend once, who is an eternally optimist. When we had very awful news, like failing an exam or losing someone in their life, she would turn it around and tried to make you see the other brighter side of life. It was just amazing because she would just say a few words and although it may sound ridiculous, eventually, it will make sense and you’ll see the right way.
I used to be an optimist but after hanging around a lot of pessimistic people, my pessimistic side got the better of me. I spent so much of my energy trying to cheer , motivate and placate their worries that I got bummed out.
However, after going through all that, it is far easier to be optimistic than pessimistic because being pessimistic, it just drains the life out of you. When you’re a pessimist, you tend to look at the bad side of the situation and start to whine, moan and groan about it, which takes a lot of energy. An optimist would just say, “ahhh… this is a bad situation, what can I do to turn it around?”
In my most humblest opinion, nobody is born a pessimist, just as nobody is born with low confidence, be they male or female. It is a matter of how we adjusted to situations which molded us to be that way.
So, at the end of the day, it is up to the person to be what they want to be, an optimist or pessimist. One can only advise and hope that they’ll see the brighter side of life.
I find that to count one’s blessings everyday is one way to stay upbeat. It is not easy but sometimes, we have to do it. Try watching/reading “The Pursuit of Happyness” and you’ll know what I mean. 😉
P/S: I’m sorry that this is LONG-WINDED. I should have posted it at my blog instead.
April 4, 2007 at 8:55 am
Alvin
nice comment Angie. I guess there’s a pessimist in everyone of us, especially in our Asian culture. but that does not stop us from being an optimist (which is obviously a better choice). our job is to bring out the optimist in us, and hide/stop/destroy the pessimist which is draining our life away.